Friday, July 30, 2004

sigh. was quite restless today. only slept for 3 hours. then was late for sch. actually i didn't wake up late. i usually wake up at 6.10 and leave the house by 6.35. i woke up at 6.15 and felt really tired. decided to slowly move around the house and could not be bothered one bit about being late. i wanted breakfast too. mom reserved noodles for me to eat. yummy. anyway i skipped kct history. after chinese the bad things just followed. THT found out about it. then later had the interhouse softball. and i was umpiring.

screwed it up lah. cuz i was very blur about the rules then i was always hesitant about whether the pitch was a ball or a strike. then still must remember the number of balls and strikes and the ppl out. wahz. sian lah. got so many things. then still must remember is one ball one strike etc. initially keep calling the wrong things. lucky everyone ard me was very supportive. telling me not to listen to the players when they argue and that the umpire was the highest authority and they had to listen to me.

i think maybe i was too stressed le. first time umpiring.. then wah everyone was very encouraging. very touched. esp kennard, sam, elda, kuanhuey, weilun, eko, wahh the list goes on.. they were all saying nice umping.. wondering if i screwed up why is it still good? wah tml still must ump again. must understand and be super sure of the rules and stuff. cannot be stressed. and most importantly don't give a f*** about who the player is cuz i am the ump!! sigh like i would be like that. i think the stress comes when they are all your frens and there are those who really want to win.. will try harder tml.

muscles still aching from gym. calfs very painful when i walk down the steps and when i touch them.. maybe will run and stretch them tml.. arms getting better but still painful. oh, sold and gave my glove to kennard and going to get the new glove after the common test. for the mean time, will use weiqi's glove. will try very hard to save money for the glove. then the next thing i want to buy is a MP3 player.haha prediction: new sch bag. holes have started to develope at the bottom of the bag. maybe end of the year, i will get a new bag... i have already spent alot. monday got math and econs test. not prepared for econs. or math either. wth. sigh..

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jaded out
@ |10:13 PM|
Tuesday, July 27, 2004

sighz. i think tuesday is my jinxed day. things never seem to go well on tuesday. forgot to tell the girls that there was training in the evening and that they had to go help bryan with the board. then simon was scolding again. crap. now, i realised that i should have worn my old shoes for pe lah. had been wearing the wrong shoes for pe [today and yesterday]. then it triggered the right knee and ankle injury lah. wth. now right ankle swollen and knee aching. shiat. hopefully can train tml. tuesday sux

hm.. during math lecture, i went for a toilet break and met yl. then we talked and suddenly talked about the sb ppl and i realised that i was not the only one.. there were other who shared my views. really sad and disillusioned. we had only stopped playing as a team afte may and things have changed so much... after chinese at library, met w and talked to her. then we talked about the same stuff too. and she had the same feelings too. wah talking mad me feel depressed lah. i guess it's not so much they changed but just that they never had a chance to show it since we had been playing as a team. or maybe i just failed to notice it. sad. life is really a tragedy.

i made myself pissed for no real reason lah. cuz of the sb thing. last week was cuz of the noise thing. must be PMS. luckily i talked to sheena about it lah. or else i am damn sure i would have exploded. then i went to throw ball went there was the gp lecture. felt much much better after that. sb makes me happy. sb makes me depressed. funny right.

CT2 coming. and i am kinda slack. wth. will go and prepare econs notes le. wah. wth. life sucks.

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jaded out
@ |10:30 PM|
Wednesday, July 21, 2004

haiz. sian sia. still kind of shaken after yesterday's interhouse between rono and owens. lynette was injured in the game when both she and rayan tried to get the portfly. they were so focused on the ball. they didn't see each other and they collided. lynette was bumped off her feet and i didn't expect the impact to be hard as they were not even running at full force or anything. then lynette just laid on her side, with her face down. as usual i would rush to fallen people. then u could see a few tiny drops of red that happened to land on her arm and you realise that she was bleeding. wah then she tried to spit away the blood then the blood like fly everywhere.

i was like wth!! i was feeling queasy and sick to the stomach seeing the blood. i have never seen so much blood in my life before! and the blood was so red and shiny. urgh!! scary! then when lyn lifted her head, all i could see what blood. i could not even see the wound lah. there was just too much blood. wah i was really shaken lor. i was like what the freak. if there had been a full ram i think someone would have gone unconscious. wah freak.

i think i am really blessed. when i have trainings and stuff, i always get hit on the shin and the legs. lucky lucky. maybe don't want to be catcher liao. i scared ppl ram me arh. will take care of myself in trainings. i want to remain blessed. but then i am having brusies all over my body lah. wah pain pain.. =(

hmm talking about training, MC didn't come for training. then wednesdays are the only days that MC will be able to make it for training cuz he got has NY training to go to on saturday. it will last till sept. haha today's training was short but i was happy cuz my t stand batting was great!!! wahahah i only missed one ball. but my throwing sucked. sianz. must not go back to my last time the throwing. my release point too high le.

anyway got nothing much to say. like is as per normal. maybe i am slacking abit and i am sleeping later already. 3 am . power right? yup yup. i am the man!!

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jaded out
@ |10:31 PM|
Friday, July 16, 2004

hmm, finally i can blog. stupid blogger. changed its format then make my life so miserable. hm maybe it's my com old lah. watever. waiting for this junk to die and make way for the new one. wahaha =) anyway i am feeling like sian now.. just had interhouse softball. sian.
 
haha watching the games was like watching the euro cup. most of the dark horses were winning. my game between owens 1 and bikila 2 was a score of 5-7. bikila won. haiz sad ah. we should not have lost. but they had a power packed guy like cai hwa. then the game between bikilia 1 and bannister 1 was the result - bilikia won again. so unexpected. then bannister 2 won rono 1. haiz. tight game. 10 - 9 . sad game too. both were quite strong, just that..
 
waiting for the owens 1 and rono 2 game on tuesday cuz they had a draw today. when i was playing, i knew their's was a damn exciting game. the score was 12 - 12. haiz damn.. will watch on tuesday i guess. haha it's either rono or owens win. and they are the only surving team for their respective houses. wahaha see who will be the 1st house to have both teams kicked out at the 1st round. haiz everyone [those who lost] were quite sad after the game. damn...
 
sian sian sian. really bored these days. doing alot of math again. and history and econs. crap crap crap. hm must remind to ask leow about my locker. it's rent expires this year. maybe should ask for a change of lockers. change to somewhere better... not one beside the toilet...

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jaded out
@ |10:11 PM|
Wednesday, July 14, 2004

with my sunday dress and sunhat, i headed for the meadows. it was summer time and buttercups were in full bloom. i looked around and all that i could see was a sea of green and yellow. the hills were filled with buttercups. i danced and swirled crossed the field, plucking the flowers and throwing them into the air. i was amused as i watched the golden snow fall around me. i was laughing myself silly as i felt the flowers tickle my legs and the petals fall on my face. finally i collapse onto the ground exhausted. i lay and watched as the wind blow and made the flowers swayed. the world seemed to be silent and i, alone. just laying there and feeling the brush for the flower petals against my cheek i felt relaxed and carefree. i begin to smile to myself and life never seemed more wonderful.

slowly, i opened my eyes and all i see before me is the flawless blue sky, with not a piece of cloud in sight. the sky is just like my mind, blank as can be. unexpectedly, an image came to me. it was an image of us, when we were together, happy and warm. the feelings were strong and nothing else in the world seemed to matter anymore. i was there for you and you were there for me... those were the days and how i miss them so.

as the memories faded, my smile grew smaller. sorrow and pain was sinking, sinking deeper into my aching heart. out of the picture you, go leaving only me and my world mourns for your absence. i try to grasp every tiniest memories i have of you. desperate to cling on and fearing i would lose even the memories of you, i feel helpless. tears formed but i stopped myself. you told me you never like to see me cry. i managed a smile - determined to face the world. i will be happy, i will smile.

i am smiling now but why do these tears flow down my cheeks?

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jaded out
@ |10:56 PM|
Sunday, July 11, 2004

haha seriously so bored doing my econs i have decided to blog. my dad was just questioning me why i have been coming home so late for the past few days. haha night study lor. and *ting* now i have $8 more for allowance. which brings my monthly allowance to a grand total of $40. hee hee.. hoped it would be $50 but can't ask for too much can i? nothing much happened this week. quite an uneventful week.

oh yes had listeing compre on saturday and i don't know. i think i cocked up 2 questions. oh well. kind of busy catchnig up with all the econs tutoials that i failed to complete so long ago. tsk tsk tsk. waiting for my death sentence i think. imagine miss tie's face scolding me cuz i didn't do her work. it would be even more realistic imagining miss tie tear up my homework and throwing her markers at me. wahahha. terrifying. got to go do eons again. been on a testionial writing frenzy this days. wahaha. must be the stress..

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jaded out
@ |8:56 PM|
Friday, July 09, 2004

the 2nd week of term 3 have just ended. so sianz. actually what i am trying to do now is to try to cool myself after i got myself so worked up over the BLARDIE LMS. wth. it does not even work properly and u expect us to go up there regularly to check for notes etc? f u. haha dun feel shocked to see that. seriously pissed with the retarted system. don't really see point of getting so angry but then the thing wasted so much of my efforts to try to use it.. angry angry..

haha slacking these days. oops, still in holiday mood. today wanted to really guai guai to start studying. then want to see kct's notes and do a nice set of notes. but wth. really want to point the 3rd finger.

meet the parents session is coming soon. i think my parents as usual would skip that session. wahahah haiz. have been enjoying myself for the pass few days. should put that to a stop with effect from today. wednesday throw ball, throw until so shuang. the today did quite abit of pitching and catching. wahaha i caught saurov's ball!! but i wonder if he slowed down for me.. hmm maybe maybe sian.

tml's listening i suppose i will just go there and listen and daydream. i think i should not have signed up for the chinese exam. see no point cuz i really have my results. damnit. waste money.

the money could have been spent on better things like a new MP3 player. which i think i would put to good use for the ight study thingy. and a new wallet. have been looking for one since my birthday. and that was the birthday present that never came. :( wahaha saw this really nice PC wallet and i really wanted to buy. but savings are now NIL. so asked mom. and mom didn't buy it for me. but she bought another wallet for grandpa. :( times two. argh!! sobz sobz. haiz my patience shall pay off. i will wait and wait for the next puiblic holiday and take DAD shopping wahaha. use his card and wahahahha *evil laugh*

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jaded out
@ |9:07 PM|
Thursday, July 08, 2004

hm. tired. very tired. dunnoe why. too tired to think to much about it. shall just sit on the problem and pretend it does not exist. hope it will just disappear. brain feels weird. shall sleep soon. brain buzzing with many questions. crap. wth. sianzz. humans should enjoy life as much as they possibly can. but how can one achieve that? some idealistic bastard must have come up with this crap. life is full of ironies and lies. screw it.

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jaded out
@ |11:01 PM|
Sunday, July 04, 2004

just came back from sleepover at adel's house. it was really not bad though it was only the 3 of us. spend the 1st few hours playing mahjong, blackjack. daide. haha like i said, that sit at the corner is my fengshui seat. wahaha. we all started with 800 chips and by midday, i had around a thousand? adel had this lamp, it was a dragonwith a dragon pearl in it's mouth. i had a constant flow of chips. wahaha shiok sia. but of cuz the luck didn't stay. we played mahjong and daide first. i was quite pro there then came blackjack. i was stil winning till i became dealer. haha maybei was not really playing the game properly. then i lost alot. but never mind lah.. had fun all the same.

we had pizza for dinner. then inital plan was to spend only $8 and suddenly the cost shot up to $13 cuz we kept adding side dishes. haha damn funny, so much for planning a budget. we spent around 2 hours eating i think. we ate and sheena told us this weirdos around her. haha for some reason or another, then suddenly adel started talking about that blardie long john incident happened like SO many years ago. damn embarressing lor cuz it happened in public. it was like i was in sec 1 then? they were still laughing their heads off. then i just sat there looking like i didn't know them. seriously, it was not that funny. then an idea stuck struck me - what if they had security cameras and FILMED THE WHOLE INCIDENT! i really got me worried. sheena commented that they might have sent it to Amercia's funniest home videos. (-_-')

we then changed topic. wahaha then we talked about the gym classes back in secondary sec. haha we all laughed at shimin's incapability to do somersaults. the instructions was that we were supposed to stand on the platform. we had to bend forward and just let ourselves fall and land on our backs. in the process of falling, we had to tuck our heads in and it would seem like we were doing somesaults in midair. then shimin, the poor guy would go up the platform and bend. then he would just let himself fall and his head just could not tuck in. in the end his head would just hit the mattress first. and we had this for 2 lessons and all along he did not change. whenever it was his turn, he would just repeat the same mistake. given the fact that there were only 7 guys in class, we could really see watch the joke happen while waiting for our turn. then there was fiona's pants. wahahah that was the worst. shall not comment on that. wahaha but seriously damn funny.

then i also told them about zhuying's funny moments. the captain's ball, 'golf', her nafa etc. then we just laughed ourselves silly at others 'abnormailities'. at the end, we were all having very bad aches near our temples and neck area - laughed too much. it was like a total bitching session. then we spent the wee hours of the morning talking about out past, present and future. really miss the days in secondary sec. especially the 1k, 2k years.. i still remember we had this silly class name - kalashnikov. a russian rifle that could fire very fast. adrian came up with it. sigh~ those were the days. i would say that was the best class that i was ever in. though we had cliques, the class was damn bonded lah.. there were so many happy memories and some of my best friends were from the simple class of 34. =) miss ya guys..

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jaded out
@ |7:09 PM|
Friday, July 02, 2004

sian dao. today's oral paper sucked big time. i think this is the first time that i go out of point for oral lah. sssssiiiaaannzzz... shiat. as usual mistakes. i actually know how to read the words and quite smooth lah. then when i am facing the invigilor, i just can't do it properly. wth. the passage was really quite easy. haha come to think about it, i don't have to be so concerned cuz i ALREADY have a passed grade so don't have to care so much.

since i was the last person in class to have my oral i was like damn sian also. then faizal was just before me. then i kept talking to him to divert my attention away from the exam. and he refused to talk. so i was talking to him and when he felt like it, speak a few lines and keep quiet. then later i became the quiet one. wahaha cuz i think talk too much liao. cannot be bothered.

also today we also celebrated josh's birthday. simon as usual got the cake and haha i got a present for him. damnit lah should have read his blog before buying the present. can minimise cost. wahaha. anyway, the deed is done. and we sang the birthday song in the canteen. he was kinda paiseh lah but haha too bad.

anyway way, i think today can be called the shit day cuz there was like shit everywhere lah. the classroom 102 smelt of shit and i was like super sian diao. my god it was in the whole room. then after that the class went to the canteen and there were two chairs with shit smeared on them. TOTALLY DISGUSTING. faizal said some guy sat on the shit and his friend told him it was nothing. then that guy was wearing pe attire then wore his pants over the pe shorts... =S JQ's bag was also dirtied.

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jaded out
@ |8:25 PM|
Thursday, July 01, 2004

today was the voting of the committee.. then oh well. bryan amd i were apointed captains. ming cheng had a part to play in the appointments. but it seems quite duh right. any idiot would have known who would be captain. haha nut i kinda dread the responsibilities and stuff. feel quite worried and not confident. ya. should have to cope with that. anyway, i AM the new captain and will have to get things done. can't sit there and do nothing..

well, my vice cap is jasmine, QM: baoyue and sec: suling. guys' vice cap: rayson, QM: kang yi, sec: tham. so on the whole the committee quite ok lar. but can tell the guys have got 2 cliques, just like their seniors. kinda sad philips didn't make any posts. he is like haoran lah. should have been vice cap but in the end sec. can't change anything anymore.

you know, i think i am starting to slack. and i mean really srating to slack. these few days i could not really get out of bed.. just lie in bed and bro had to come call me to get out of bed. tired lah. sian sian sian.

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jaded out
@ |10:40 PM|